We’re taking it back to another shape that we are all very familiar with- a square.
Now I want you to picture a square…how would you describe it? I would describe it as a shape that has four equal sides. Keep that in mind as I will go on to explain how this is of importance.
When we experience something negative, we tend to have a fight or flight response. When faced with a stressful situation, or even a bad experience with a person, a biological trigger helps us to decide whether to stay and fight or in simple terms, get the heck out of there (flight).
In this post we are focusing on the latter decision and the consequences of doing such a thing. When we want to escape from something or someone our mind starts to close itself off, a guard to prevent such an issue from arising again.
Let me give you an example. If someone you trust, someone you thought could never do such a thing, wrongs you, what’s your reaction? Is it to continue to trust them or to protect yourself from that person by putting up a wall?
We are constantly trying to protect ourselves from people, situations, circumstances and sometimes even our own feelings so as not to get hurt. And rightly so. The thing I struggle with, and I’m sure many others struggle with too is knowing when the time is right to stop playing defence, to allow someone into your life, to allow yourself to take advantage of an opportunity, or something as simple as letting the world know how you really feel.
Now let’s take it back to the square. Earlier on I described it as something that had four symmetrical sides. See I believe this to be the four walls we tend to build to close ourselves off from a person or situation that we don’t want to deal with. Four walls, four sides that represent our mind, body, heart and soul. We build these four walls up so that no one can tear us down. But in doing so, we’re stopping all the opportunities, rewards, comforts and blessings from coming our way. In keeping out the bad, we’re also keeping away all the things and people that could be good for us.
I always see quotes such as ‘sometimes our walls exist just to see who has the strength to knock’ or ‘people build up walls not to keep others out but to see who cares enough to break them down’ and I have to admit, I myself have used these quotes in the past. But it got me thinking…why is it always that we believe the walls need to be knocked down from the outside? The four walls are protecting our mind, heart, body or soul…a person. Why is it never that person who finds the strength to break down the walls?
This is something that 2018 has taught me. I thought I needed to wait for the right person or situation to come knocking at one of the four walls for me to be successful, be given the opportunities I crave so much or to feel more confident in my own skin. In reality all I really had to do was find the courage to step out of my comfort zone, and in doing so, knock down the very same walls that I thought were there to protect me but really were keeping me from the people and opportunities that I had been waiting for all along.
Courage begins with yourself. People can tell you that you can do absolutely whatever it is that your heart desires, but unless you tell yourself that, nothing will ever become of it.
I’m learning to knock the walls over myself, from the inside out, and I hope you can do the same, even if it’s one brick at a time. You have the strength, you’ve ALWAYS had the strength and now I hope you’ve found the courage to go along with it.
Remember- you were given this life because you’re strong enough to live it.